Everything's bigger in Texas or the Langoliers are following me

In Texas everything is big.   The windmills, the prairies and the people's great dispositions.    Now about those windmills... Hundreds span the prairies.  Enough to make you feel like you are in a scene from Stephen Kings Langoliers.  There are so many its as if they are following you through time.  
Texas is amazing.   Prairie everywhere then BAM. Rocky cliff and bluffs.  The windmills soon get replaced by sagebrush and vista views. 

Black Betty is taking us to our final destination in style.  She is covered in bug carcasses an 1/8 of an inch thick.   Frequent windshield cleanings are a necessity on this trip.

Did I mention how fabulously nice Texans are?  Damned polite too. 

Halfway through our route 66 trip.  1139 miles to go. 

Cousin Eddie and the worm farm.

Missouri is HUGE. *insert Trump voice*.  Oklahoma is HUGER *insert Trump voice again.  
Road hypnosis is a real thing.  To keep our sanity DH (I affectionately call him FANG) purchased XM radio with our rental, hence our QX60.  We are quite the sight. Yes that is us cruising along singing ABACAB at the top of our lungs.

My FANG 

3 corners. OK, MO, KS

Closed bridge of rt 66 in Tulsa

Corn, cattle, Bible signs and oil wells dot the scenery.  Bathrooms are few and far between.  Children have the worst habit of having to go to the bathroom after you passed the last one.  Rest stops and towns are up to an hour drive. 

People, for the most part, are awfully friendly. (St. Louis was a bit stiff-shirted IMHO but Chicagoans are damned nice). This morning I had quite the chuckle.  The nice young man clearing our breakfast table asked where we were from.  My reply, of course, was a proud New Jersey.  A shocked look came upon his face.  "You don't sound like you are from New Jersey."My reply was " well we all don't sound like Snookie". What a chuckle he gave.  

Last stop for the night was Tylers BBQ in Amarillo Texas.  It was so good both boys wolfed down their pulled whatevers in less than five minutes.   Everything just tastes better in Texas.   Mmmmmgood. 

I'm NOT done!

Traveling across America a lady learns something very fast.  That the automatic flush toilets were designed by men.  We go in the stall, some of us pre-paper the toilet seat, while others do the crouch.  But by the time it is time for us to wipe, the toilet flushes on us splashing our naked backsides with toilet water. 

I guess I should consider this my Christening across Route 66.

planes trains and automobiles or I'm Radioactive

 Fabulous but hot day in St Louis.  The Gateway Arch was always a bucket list item for me and it was worth every penny I gave them.  The elevator egg(the pod you ride to the top) fit 5 snugly.   I had the fun of being in a pod with a person with a fear of enclosed spaces, and not it wasn't me.  Up to was a fantastic view that took your breath away.

Afterward was the best St. Louis ribs ever.  No singing the blues here.

FIVE stars IMHO.

Then we were off to the Anheuser Busch to see how beer is made and to procure plenty of samples.

Lastly, it was a Cardinals game.

  We are tired and Oklahoma and Texas are very far away.

To Infinity and beyond...

Naming a vehicle you are spending the next 2 weeks in exploring America, is damned near impossible.
Family Truckster?  
Big black poop?  
To Infinity and Beyond?  Eh that's more of the title of our family adventure.   We got lucky enough (the car Gods were with us in the airport car rental counter) and we managed to get the Infinity QX60.  Now for a name.....
The Premium Gas Guzzler?

Yet again missing my oldest son.   He has already missed one rousing game of He Who Smelt it Dealt it.    Dios Mios.  I couldn't find the switch for the sunroof fast enough.  Imagine someone pulled the pin from a grenade and scrambling to find the pin to reinsert it. Same thing.

Stopping in these small towns makes me love my country even more.  Quaint old towns with populations of 600,  that don't bat an eye when you stop to take pictures.  Miles upon miles up in miles of corn take up your viewing pleasure.  This is just a small glimpse into the farming infrastructure of America.  

Atlanta Illinois. Just stop there.  It's small but large in heart.  The gift shop was run by a sweet lady with the most spirited heartland drawl, full of hometown pride.

Miles to go before we sleep in St. Louis.  

Wagon Queen Family Truckster or....

Another rainy day in New York City CHICAGO.

It is wet out there.  Forecast are calling for low visibility and lots of rain. So we are eliminating many of our outdoor plans on this last day in Chicago. An impromptu drive to the Indiana border for shits and giggles is in order for this screwy family.  Be WARNED!  Illinois is the apparent land of toll booths.  Just as Pennsylvania has road comes, Illinois has toll booths.   Be will prepared as signage can be iffy if you are behind tractor trailers and your eye line is limited.  This state will get your buck fifty out of your hide one way or another.

Gary Indiana. What can I say? It made my soul cry.  And I'll leave it at that.  

Willis Tower or the formerly known Sears tower was amazing!  A must do in Chicago!

Breakfast just felt off.   That missing man formation in the chow line is what threw me off.   Counting to three had always been my mom method of keeping my family in tow.  Counting to two is much harder to do than expected. 

25 or 6 to 4 OR Looking for Abe Froman

This is our first official, as a family,  visit to the Windy City AKA Chicago.   After viewing it in all the John Hughes movies my whole life, this is pretty much a dream come true.  The list of things we will be doing in Chicago is pretty huge.  But at the top of our list is a Baseball game at Wrigley Field to watch the Cubs, and a trip up the Willis Tower (formerly known as the Sears Tower, once the tallest building in the world).     

Yesterday I was texted 3 times and received one phone call from the son who "chose" to stay home.  All of these communications occurred in the first 12 hours of me being away.  Yet, when he was away at college, months would go by and not one form of communication from him.   I included the forms of ESP and smoke signals.  Now my phone beepeeth over.   I guess it was okay when he left me, but not so easy when I left him.  Moms, you need your sons.   But honestly no matter how much they kvetch, they need you more. And our gift to them is teaching them how to truly ADULT.  Dorming isn't ADULTING.   It's a vacation without parents.

 Today is the beginning of a whirlwind trip across America via Historic ROUTE 66.  This will be Day 1 of Jake and Elwood in the backseat of our family-sized qx60 rental playing  He Who Smelt it Dealt It.  Dear God, there are no winners in that game, only losers.


This now family of 4 and just our carry on bags will be traversing America trying to find the best there is out there.  The best food.  The best attractions.  The best of people.  We will be getting our kicks on Route 66.
Whilst in the Second City I will be keeping my eyes peeled for Diefenbaker, Balki, and Kolchak.

KEVIN!

“- Kate McCallister: Did you close the garage?

- Peter McCallister: That's it. I forgot to close the garage, that's it.

- Peter McCallister: No, that's not it.

- Kate McCallister: Well, what else could we be forgetting?

- Kate McCallister: Kevin!”

Erma Bombeck where art thou?

"Everyone is guilty at one time or another of throwing out questions that beg to be ignored, but mothers seem to have a market on the supply. "Do you want a spanking or do you want to go to bed?" Don't you want to save some of the pizza for your brother?" Wasn't there any change?"

-Erma Bombeck

My addition to her quote is now "Are you going on vacation with us?"

 I am facing, for the first time, a vacation without a child in tow.   He has chosen to stay home from our yearly family vacation. (I mean what is wrong with him? We have the best Griswold Vacations but I digress)  We as moms oftentimes forget that time is fleeting when we first start out.  We get lost in the whirlwind of diapers, playdates, sport and music practices, visiting college campuses yadda yadda yadda.  Many kind-hearted moms that we know, remind us to cherish the time with our children because time flies.   Tempus Fugit.
I am a longtime follower of Erma Bombeck. I did as she told me. I burned the fancy candles. I left the beds unmade. All to have more enjoyable times with my children.   But how did she not warn me about this day?
This trip has inspired me to write about my transformation. Please pardon my horrific middle school writing.   For the last 23 years, the most writing I have ever done was "Please Excuse" school notes, and Post It Note messages scattered around the house.  To this day I am still writing DONT EAT. PRE-LICKED  or  EMPTY DISHWASHER FOR WI-FI p.w.
That is him in the picture, the one looking away, or maybe not away, he's looking forward.  Towards his own life. At least I still have 2 still looking at me and smiling.  Well, one is smiling. Ah crap.

Pittsburgh fall 2018

When mothers talk about the depression of the empty nest, they're not mourning the passing of all those wet towels on the floor, or the music that numbs your teeth, or even the bottle of capless shampoo dribbling down the shower drain. They're upset because they've gone from supervisor of a child's life to a spectator. It's like being the vice president of the United States.

Erma Bombeck